Our Journey: ADHD & Gifted « curlykidz

There’s still more here and there, but I think I have the bulk of the “milestones” transferred.

Archive for the ‘ADHD & Gifted’ Category

via ADHD & Gifted « curlykidz.

ADHD tools: focus booster

I downloaded this on my work PC this afternoon, and it was really pretty helpful. I’ve gotten to the point where I tune out outlook reminders, and even reminders from mycell phone  palm pilot pocket pc blackberry. I was really surprised by how much I got done in the 25 minutes I used it… not allowing myself to be distracted by new incoming mail or other tasks and just focusing on this ONE folder in my mailbox… although I couldn’t exactly ignore the Office Communicator message that came in from a colleague in another department… I downloaded it on my laptop at home in hopes of managing my blogging time better (I get lost on google when I do research & fact checking)… it takes me WAY too long to compose!!!

A free application to help you get what you need done. Pronto!

 focus booster is a simple and elegant application designed to help you eliminate the anxiety of time and enhance your focus and concentration.

focus booster has been designed based on the principles of the Pomodoro Technique and features:

• a sleek and unobtrusive design
• changes color as time goes by for quick, peripheral updates
• alarm/buzzer sounds for completed sessions
• customizeable time and sound settings
• session counter

It’s quick to start up and works efficiently in the background without consuming computer resources, or your focus.

Pomodoro in your browser!

Don’t feel like installing our desktop version? Away from your computer? Use our online version, focus booster live!

Coming soon!

• break counter to keep you rollin’ through the sessions (v1.0)
• record your sessions with notes and rating
• online community to track and share your sessions

What is the Pomodoro Technique?

the Pomodoro Technique is a time management method created by Francesco Cirillo. It can be used for any kind of task and enables you to view time as a valuable ally in acomplishing what you want to do.

focus booster is a digital pomodoro timer to help you implement the Pomodoro Technique as quickly and efficiently as possible. Use it with ease and no fuss to focus on the things that are important, ignoring the distractions.

#ADHD (& Gifted) « @curlykidz

OK, I’m busily transferring more of those blog archives from other locations, and have been focusing on some from about two and a half years ago, when my oldest hit a dark, scary, and unfortunately, very common place for kids who are exceptional learners: anxiety, depression, and thougths of suicide.

Here’s the link to the ADHD/Gifted archives:

ADHD & Gifted « curlykidz.

Me and My Shadow: Life with ADHD

A Hollywood writer and producer, who wrestled with ADD since childhood, spills it all: what he’s learned about himself, the unaccepting world, and his ADD brethren.

by Frank South

 

Ed Krieger  

One lesson I’ve learned: We ADHD folks are everywhere.

We’re the creative vice-president in the cubicle who, while you’re yelling at us for missing another deadline, comes up with the intuitive leap that saves a whole product line. We’re the spouse whose highly sensitive antennae pick up a vibe from our 13-year-old daughter that she needs to talk. So we sit down with her for a half-hour as she pours out her problems, leaving you waiting at the car place, after promising you we wouldn’t be late.

We’re the 20-something working at the fast-food drive-through who forgot to remove the pickle that you’re allergic to from the Double cheeseburger. We feel terrible—I swear we’re not doing any of this on purpose—but we also find it so freaky funny that we’ll put the whole mess in a stand-up routine that will knock you out laughing when you see it on HBO in two years.

We’re the fifth-grader who makes you wish you had gone into the forestry service and been stationed out in the wilderness rather than teaching us. But then one day we not only hand in our homework—finally—but we also hand in a startling pastel-and-pencil drawing of you that captures the light coming across your desk from the window exactly the way it does every afternoon. You realize that we weren’t staring out the window, we were staring at the light coming in.

We are not stupid or crazy. Well, I could be fairly labeled crazy-ish, due primarily to my off-the-charts ADHD, hypomania, alcoholism, and some depressive tendencies. When you get over being furious at the things we did or didn’t do, don’t waste time feeling sorry for us. We’re working on being less forgetful and accidentally destructive. Even though we talk with shrinks and coaches, work on our social and organizational skills, and take our meds, our core ADHD selves are not going to change into anything normal. Guess what? I don’t think you want us to. That’s because we remind you of that part of you that doesn’t fit in, that’s dying to open the dark door down the hall.

I think we have some balance again

March 28, 2006 – Tuesday 9:30 PM

I think we have some balance again Current mood:  lethargic Category: Life    Thanks so much for your words of encouragement, here and in your emails. There is so much going on all at once that I feel dizzy. And tired. Friday night I spoke with Tyler about what is leading up to his feelings, which was a terribly scary thing for me.  Kenneth’s name came up often, as did a couple others I’ve heard before.  Tyler is also troubled about his friendship with Allie, which seems to have hit the rocks.  I asked Tyler specific questions about his feelings, and he indicated that he thinks the other kids would stop acting the way they do if he were to kill himself.  I asked him if he just wanted to teach them a lesson, or if he really did not want to live, and he said that he wants them to learn a lesson, but he also does not want to live the way he’s been living.  I asked too, if he feels like he wants to kill himself when he’s in trouble at home or if he feels like we (his family) also need a lesson… he said no, and that I already knew everything I needed to know. I can’t even begin to tell you the weight that lifted off me… because the night before I was in the bubble bath, crying to Ro on the phone that I feel like all I do is yell at him or tell him what he’s doing wrong, and it’s my fault he’s so unhappy. After that conversation, I felt a little less like having a nervous breakdown.  As far as I can tell right now, these feelings are primarily stemming from his peer relationships at school… although I’m sure that the negative feedback he gets at home doesn’t help a ton, nor does Ro’s continued mentality that Tyler’s behavior is chosen.  He’s still in the mindset that Tyler is smart enough that he could behave ”if he wanted to.” LaTona also asked about the possibility of a connection between the ADHD and the meds.  I think there is as much a correlation to the time of year than whether he’s on medication.  Another thing I have to take into consideration is that this isn’t the first time Tyler has expressed the idea of killing himself.  He was having some kind of argument with a tablemate in Kinder, and announced that he was going to go home and kill himself with a knife.  That was long before he was diagnosed ADHD or started Adderall, probably two years before Adderall, but if I remember right, it was during the ‘winter’ months.  From what Tyler told me tonight, the instance he relayed to Theresa happened between winter and spring break, and is the only time he can remember feeling so bad he wanted to die.  I do know that during the first part of second grade, he was expressing feelings of worthlessness so often that I was very concerned about something like this being on the horizon.  I am considering alternatives, but I’m worried if I take him off meds completely and he goes back to being unable to function in the classroom.  Not only will he still have the peer trouble, but he’ll also start having feelings of stupidity and worthlessness on top of that… and (re)develop a troublemaker reputation to boot, at this school where he has had a reputation of being a smart, focused, dedicated student.  Not to mention, I think he would adamently be opposed to being taken of meds.  He was resistant to trying Strattera, until he realized he would continue taking the Adderall during the trial.     Tyler and I met with a therapist on Saturday, have I mentioned that?  Most of the session was me giving historical information.  I liked the therapist, and I feel she understands ADHD better than the first therapist we tried (the one who told me Tyler needed more consistency) or even the therapist who referred me to my current psychiatrist.  Mamta works with a psychiatrist she really likes, and wants Tyler to see him as well.  Balbir and Tyler kept each other occupied while I was in with Mamta, and they liked each other.  Mamta assured me that she has a 100uccess rate… I assume that means she hasn’t had a patient commit suicide.  Mebbe I should clarify that point.  Anyway, she spoke with Tyler about coming back to see her, and then pulled me aside.  She indicated that it appeared he would be very receptive to counseling, and she was really looking forward to working with him.  His next appointment, is next Tuesday.  Oh, and last Friday I went to my onsite employee relations representative… Whatever I need to do as far as therapy or doctor appointments for Tyler are covered under FMLA, I just have to have some paperwork completed.  Apparently, I can even take leave if he needs me to be with him on a 24-7 basis.  As tempting as it was to grab that opportunity, I think that would be more for my benefit than his.  He just needs normal right now… whatever normal is.   I emailed LaTonya today… some of you know her as the subject of my abject hero worship.  She was Tyler’s 2nd grade teacher, and I kid you not that she is what kept me from having a nervous breakdown from the time school started in August, till Tyler’s ADHD was diagnosed in late November.  She and I have kept in touch and I consider her a dear friend, an ally, and invaluable source of support… she also happens to be Halle’s Big Sister through BB/BS.  She was also diagnosed ADHD as a child, which gave her a feel for Tyler that I can hardly describe.  She, like many others, have expressed disbelief that Tyler would contemplate suicide.  But she said in her email, even as she typed, she vividly remembered entertaining thoughts of dying as a child, because she was ALWAYS in trouble.  Like me, she never planned to actually go through with it, and hadn’t really thought of those feelings in years.  I was also always in trouble, and struggled terribly with peer relationships.  I entertained suicidal thoughts in vivid detail and at times concocted elaborate suicide plans, and it’s hard for me to say how I really felt then… but in hindsight, I would say I did not plan to ever actually carry any of them out.  Which is the thin thread by which I’m holding onto sanity knowing Tyler is having these thoughts… is that I continued to live, and had also pushed those suicidal thoughts into the back of my mind, so it’s reasonable to expect that he will too, since he’s certainly going to have more support than I did.

Heidi

Baby Steps are still steps in the right direction! Tyler, You and the Family have such wonderful support – it is so good to hear that everything is begining to balance again.  I say this only because it was a comment made recently, and your mention of seasonal issues is relavent – apparently, with seasonal affective disorder, the ‘patient’ can take medication just through those months and it has significantly helped the feelings of helplessness/hopelessness.  The medication that was discussed was Wellbutrin. Hugs to you all!      Posted by Heidi on March 28, 2006 – Tuesday – 11:14 PM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

	CURLYGURL	Wellbutrin is actually one of the meds on my potential alternatives list… It’s a ’second tier’ drug for treating ADHD… i.e., that’s not what it was made to treat, but it’s still been found effective.   Posted by CURLYGURL on March 29, 2006 – Wednesday – 6:28 AM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

	Belle Belle Godfrey	Cyn…I too am glad that you are feeling somewhat better and so is Tyler!  My heart is so heavy for that little boy! When my doc wanted me to be placed on Wellbuterin…I did alot of research and there were tons of sites devoted to that drug causing seizures and SUICIDAL thoughts….thoughts that people never had until they got on the drug.  Just a thought and you are 100% better at research than I am….but I refused to take it due to those two reasons. I know you will make the right choices and decisions for him…I love you!      Posted by Belle on March 29, 2006 – Wednesday – 6:46 AM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

	CURLYGURL	Thanks, Bella… the thing is, ALL psychiatric and neurological meds have some suicide risk.  Adderall has a (rare) side effect of exacerbating depression, and in some (rare) cases has triggered mania.  Many of the stimulant medications list seizures as a possible side effect (although for most, the ‘chances’ are 1/1000 I think). Anytime you start messing with the body’s chemical make-up, there are going to be side effects.  It just depends on whether the risk of a really bad side effect from meds, is greater than the risks associated with having an untreated condition.  So when I think about the risks associated with any med, I have to take into consideration that gifted kids, and kids with ADHD, both have a much higher rate of suicide than the general population, and a much higher risk of depression.  They have higher substance abuse rates, because they often try to self medicate with alcohol or recreational drugs.  Kids with ADHD engage in riskier sexual behaviors and are more likely to contract STD’s, which is a scary thought these days.  People with ADHD also get in more car accidents.  So when I take into consideration the chance Tyler might develop high blood pressure as a result of Adderall, compared to his risk of suicide without it, or the risk of him dying as a result of some other risky behavior… the possibility of high blood pressure is the least likely to develop, and with careful medical care, possibly the one that would be easiest to catch/treat.      Posted by CURLYGURL on March 29, 2006 – Wednesday – 7:06 PM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

	Belle Belle Godfrey	See my doll…you are much more knowledgable then myself…I love you and will keep sending ya positive thoughts!   Posted by Belle on March 30, 2006 – Thursday – 12:16 PM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

Ei

Cyndi, I’m sorry I thought I responded to this yesterday. As everyday, you are in my thoughts and in my heart.  I’m so glad you all are finding your way through this rough time.  Give them all some smooches from the Eiball.      Posted by Ei on March 30, 2006 – Thursday – 7:08 AM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

I think we have some balance again – CURLYGURL’s MySpace Blog | Cyndi–s Jewels Shared via AddThis 

 

 

 

 

on the dark side of ADHD

I try not to ‘relive’ my life through my children.  I make a conscious effort to try and NOT transfer my own emotions and experiences onto Tyler’s life, even while I try and tap into those same emotions and experiences so that I can empathize with what he’s going through, and help him.  I’ve noticed I keep saying to myself, things like… we’re going to be OK.  I suddenly feel like I am reliving my childhood.  I was not a stranger to ’dark’ fantasies… wouldn’t everyone just feel terrible about the way they’d treated me, if I were dead… whether in some horrible accident, while heroically saving someone from a house fire, or by taking my own life.

The good news is, Tyler’s ’suicide plan’ involves cutting himself with a knife.  The ‘good’ in this?  It’s very difficult to commit suicide with a knife, it’s very difficult to even cut yourself with a knife… so there’s little concern that Tyler may actually kill himself, or even harm himself.  That he, at 9 years old, has thought enough about dying, or felt bad enough, often enough, to formulate a specific plan, regardless how unlikely the plan is to work, is what the concern is.

When Tyler answered Theresa last Thursday, he cited an incident between himself and another classmate he doesn’t get along with, K.  I was aware of the friction between him and K, and in February when Tyler wrote his self report, it flagged Mr. C’s attention as well, and he spoke with Tyler about it, and then Tyler, Mr. C, and myself spoke about it, and Mr. C spoke with K.  K frequently makes these ‘zinger’ comments, and thinks they are funny, and Mr. C has been trying to work with K to realize they are not.  Mr. C and I both discussed with Tyler that K is wrong to act this way, but to keep in mind that he acts this way towards others, rather than actively targeting Tyler.  Tyler agreed that this was true, and Mr. C was going to speak with K.  I’m not sure what the results of that convo were, but I’ll be finding out this week. 

It’s hard to sum up this last week.  It really is.

Heidi

Unfortunately, the part that makes us “good parents” is the part that has to sometimes ‘relive’ the ugly in order to move forward and guide those babies.  This is what makes your relationship with your child unique, because you ARE able to empathize, relate and understand through your own experiences and it provides the buffer for them to NOT have to live it quite so hard or when they do hit it hard, you are the one person who can bring them back.  Sometimes it is hard to look into our childrens eyes and see the mirror of ourselves, because in them we see the pain we experienced and we feel the anguish of their suffering.  You are a Great Mom!!  Just remember that!  The love you all have for each other – - WILL get you through this!!    Posted by Heidi on March 27, 2006 – Monday – 11:51 PM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

	Ei	Cyndi, I can’t tell you how many times I look into the eyes of my children in fear that they will live my most painful childhood memories (in fact I’m kind of going through the same thing right now, just a different picture from a different past in a different frame, you know?) I’m glad most of all that you are getting Tyler the help he needs right now.  The difference between them and us is they HAVE us.  At least in my case, even if she’d been able to see through her own issues I don’t know if my own mother would have known HOW to make better choices for me.  I’m so glad that Tyler has that uber blessing he calls mom.   Posted by Ei on March 28, 2006 – Tuesday – 5:34 AM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

Belle Belle Godfrey

I think “K”…needs to chill.  Would talking to his mom make a difference.  Sometimes, moms and dads are worse than their kids. I love you and you know Tyler has his own special place in my heart!  You are amazing and will pave the way for him.  I hurt for him too.   Posted by Belle on March 28, 2006 – Tuesday – 6:30 AM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

on the dark side of ADHD – CURLYGURL’s MySpace Blog | Cyndi–s Jewels

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{big breath}

March 26, 2006 – Sunday 10:41 PM

{big breath}

Current mood: worried

Category: Life

Thursday we had the follow up appointment with Dr. Kessler’s PNP, Theresa Rimer. Dr. Kessler is the director of St Joe’s (not luke’s) AZ Child Study Center, who was on the panel that rewrote the AAP criteria for diagnosing ADHD in children, but you probably know that from the blog link. Sorry, I’m still a little in awe that we see this guy. After we got the referral in 1/2005 when I was worried, we also scaled back on his meds. Things had been better, but in October I noticed some changes in his behavior (socially) that I thought coincided with the last school change, and in November, a spike in other behaviors that coincided with a trial of strattera and Joel announcing that he and Sandy were having ‘baby surprise.’

This appointment was to get the results of the forms I was asked to have completed after our November visit, by myself and Tyler’s teacher. One was for ADHD, which we know, and screenings for mood disorders. I was not surprised that Tyler is showing somewhat significant levels of depression & anxiety… although he seems to be doing better now than he was Nov-Jan. 

in the solar plexus was when Theresa said she had some questions for Tyler, which started with how often does he worry or feel anxious, does he ever feel sad or depressed… the answers to which I could have answered for him.  After all, I’m his mother and I know him better than anybody, right? 

Then she asked him if he’d ever thought about hurting or killing himself… and he said yes.  She asked very matter of factly, ‘How would you do it?’ and he relayed what is clinically referred to as ‘a suicide plan.’  Which is why they recommended therapy right away, which I already have set up.  We had our first session on Saturday.  OK, that’s about all the energy I’ve got for tonight.  I’ll write more later… but he’s OK right now… so I’m OK too.

via {big breath} – CURLYGURL’s MySpace Blog | Cyndi–s Jewels.

Ei	Hug, kiss, love. Love, love, love. Wish I could do more.   Posted by Ei on March 27, 2006 – Monday – 5:35 AM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

		Love to you all.  I was thinking about you all weekend.    Posted by on March 27, 2006 – Monday – 5:46 AM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

Belle Belle Godfrey

I love you Cyndi.  My thoughts are so with you right now!     Posted by Belle on March 27, 2006 – Monday – 12:09 PM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

Energy/Prayer Request…

It’s hard for me to do this, because I know most of you are working hard to overcome your own painful situations, but Tyler really needs your good stuff right now… He had an appointment today at St. Luke’s Child Study Center. I wish I had it in me to go into detail… but I don’t so I’ll just have to beg for your patience until I find my equilibrium again.

Please, the next time you talk to God, mention my son.

ADHD Perspective: my name is Wild Child… – 2006

This is a personal narrative from my son, describing his ADHD.

March 6, 2006 – Monday 10:35 PM

My name is Wild Child and I am nine years old.  I go to [ABC School].  I am in 4th grade and I am in Mr. Homeroom’s classroom and I have Mrs. Gifted for reading.  I am gifted and I have ADHD.  My ADHD makes it really hard for me to remember things and pay attention.  It also makes it hard for me to sit still.  I take medicine for my ADHD.  When I take my medicine, I feel like regular me, but kinda tired and not so excited.  When I don’t take my medicine, I feel really excited about everything, and I feel jumpy and I want to move a lot and stuff like that.  I like taking my medicine.  I feel like I’m getting a whole lot better grades than I did when I was in second grade and I didn’t know I had ADHD; it helps me sit still in class and pay attention a little better. Sometimes when my teacher is giving directions, I look at him while he’s talking but then my eyes start drifting off to something else and then my brain starts thinking about that thing.  One day while we were talking about math, Mr. Homeroom was teaching us about the problems for that day, and I looked at one of the math problems, a multiplication problem, and I started staring.  Then my brain started reading the numbers backwards and thinking of different multiplication problems and I wasn’t paying attention anymore.  I didn’t figure out the answer, so when Mr. Homeroom called me I didn’t know the answer.  After that Mr. Homeroom told me to go back to the thinking table.  I think I was in trouble for not paying attention.

Just think of me as the white rabbit (Section 504 Update) – 2006

Just think of me as the white rabbit (Section 504 Update) – CURLYGURL’s MySpace Blog | Cyndi–s Jewels

I’m up half the night at home researching for this and then at work I’m furtively printing documentation like mad in between tasks… I’m so behind in everything… work, housework, friends… ya know… life.

Aside from my ‘independant research’ I made a few phone calls that kinda bolstered my confidence.  On Monday I spent nearly 45 minutes with the director of gifted services at the AZ Dept of Ed, and yesterday I about 30 minutes on the phone with a staff attorney from the US Dept of Ed’s Office of Civil Rights… I’ll have to post details of those conversations this weekend.

I finally confirmed the date of the next CST (child study team)/504 Accommodations meeting on Tuesday, 3/8.  Tyler’s teacher, the school’s gifted teacher, the school’s SpEd coordinator, and the District’s 504 coordinator will all be in attendance… not sure about the school Psychologist.  I called to follow up with Ms. SpEd, and discovered she’d forgotten all about him (eyes roll outta my head).  That was the weightier of the reasons we decided to continue the meeting, so that he could attend.  She’s sweet and seems well intentioned, but either she’s overworked or she’s on the ditzy side.

So my task between now and then is to sort through the two or three reams of paper I’m hefting around with me everywhere I go, and figure out how much of it I want to carry into this meeting.  I have about twice as much paperwork as I had when I went to the last meeting.  Mr. Teacher made a wow comment, and Ms. SpEd looked a little freaked out when I plopped that bulging 2 in binder on the conference table.  I also need to get some records from Tyler’s initial diagnosis/comments from that psychologist.  I’m trying to get some records out of the old school district and I am so hot with them right now… they only have scores for Tyler’s 2nd grade SAT-9’s.  No SAT-9 scores for 3rd grade, and no AIMS scores.  For those of you in AZ… you know the AIMS.  IT’S FREAKING REQUIRED FOR A CHILD TO PASS IT TO GRADUATE FROM 3RD, 8TH, AND 12TH GRADES and they have no record of it.

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Tyler’s 504 (long one)….

With Tyler’s report card, I also got a letter from the school requesting my permission to formally evaluate him for gifted services.  Can’t remember if I posted about this at the time, but one of my reservations about sending the kids to this other district is that their guidelines for gifted services are exactly as mandated by state law… a score on an approved test of 97th percentile or higher.  Our home district, because of the socioeconomic factors and high ESL (english as a second language) population, offered gifted services to students with lower scores, but I can’t remember what exactly the cut off was.  This isn’t a problem for Halle, she scored ”98 plus” on the Raven’s, but Tyler’s highest scores were 95th & 96th e (on the WISC III), he is below the cut off for gifted services in the Kyrene district.  Of further concern to me, is that Kyrene’s initial screening test is the CoGat,which both the kids have taken and neither did particularly well on.  Many of these ‘IQ’ tests are commonly known in academic communities to be racially, culturally, and economically biased.  White suburban kids tend to do quite well on them… and so do white midwestern kids where these tests are normed.  Brown inner city kids, not so much. And I guess it goes without saying that the CoGat isn’t the test of choice for children with learning disabilities of any kind, including ADHD.  I spoke with someone in gifted services at the district, as well as with the gifted teacher at the school, before I enrolled them and was comfortable with the discussion, and it was agreed by all that we’d address whether Tyler needed the gifted curriculum after we saw how he did on the intake evaluations and in the regular classroom, since it’s more academically advanced than the one he was coming from.  He was placed in the gifted reading class as a guest student the first day after his initial reading evaluation showed he was reading at an 8th grade level, and he was placed in the highest math track in his regular classroom (he missed an entire quarter on division while he was at the f-ing charter school reviewing 2 and 3 digit addition ).

So I gave permission for him to be formally evaluated, but had some reservations because I anticipated he would be given the CoGat.  Next night I find out that Tyler is being tested in a group setting, and had not asked for a study corral, which is one of this 504 accomodations.  Now, Tyler is the first ADHD/504 student his gifted teacher has had, so I figure it’s an oversight.  I get in touch with her to express my concerns and there’s a flurry at the school because apparently, Roosevelt didn’t include his 504 when they forwarded his records.  I should have known.  However, Lisa indicates that Tyler’s verbal comprehension score (95th e) on the WISC, coupled with the fact that he does have a condition that impacts his performance on standardized tests, may be sufficient to formally qualify him for gifted services in reading, but they will need to qualify him with another test in order for him to go into the gifted math class. So we tentatively scheduled the testing to reconvene after Tyler’s teacher, the special resource teacher who handles special ed (aka SPED), and myself meet and develop a new 504.  Because the 504 I had to go to the RSD office to get is expired anyway (they have to be redone each year).  In the meantime, I’m told by Tyler’s teacher that Tyler is not allowed to have accomodations during a gifted evaluation, per the SPED teacher, per somone at KSD.

You can imagine my response.  I’ve read Section 504, thank you very much, and my understanding is this… congress guarantees my son reasonable accomodations because he has a disability that impacts his learning, and to deny him those accomodations would be considered discrimination against a student protected by the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act.  So basically, someone is telling me that Kyrene’s standard policy for access to gifted services discriminates against students with disabilities.

I don’t think that’s actually the intention… gifted students are a small percentage of the student population, as is the percentage of students who qualify for 504 plans.  The percentage of ‘twice exceptional’ students like Tyler, who are both gifted and learning disabled, is even smaller.  It seems that Tyler may be the first 2E student any of the staff I’ve dealt with thus far have ever encountered.  And everyone truly seems to have the best of intentions where Tyler is concerned, so thankfully I’ve been able to approach this in a positive and collaborative manner.

So we had the 504 meeting, and really expanded on what had been there before to address some issues I see starting to crop up (there’s a lot more writing this year, which wasn’t an issue last year) and I was really happy with the classroom and homework accomodations we came up with, some suggested by Tyler’s regular classroom teacher & the SpEd coordinator, which I wouldn’t even have asked for.  I’ll share more of that when it’s final though.  We decided that we’d really need to meet again to finalize it since we were an hour into the meeting on a Friday afternoon, and Ms. Sped asked if I had any other questions.  I asked Mr. 4th Grade about Tyler’s math performance.  I wanted to know if he felt Tyler needed the additional challenge of the gifted math curriculum, or was he just keeping up where he was.  He indicated that when he breaks the kids up into skill groups in his classroom, he groups Tyler with the kids who are in the gifted math class and that he felt Tyler could definitely handle it.

So then I dive into the whole ‘accomodations’ thing and explain that not only for Tyler, but for the ‘greater good’ I want clarification on the district policy as it was explained to me… to the point that I want to know what this policy is based on.  I explain my understanding of 504, and that based on my understanding, their policy violates federal law… and if that’s not the case, and there is some obscure law I don’t know about that says disabled students are not entitled to protection under 504 for gifted services (which I can’t imagine, since gifted services fall under special ed in AZ), then I want to know chapter and verse what that law is and where I can find it.

We’ll be having a Child Study Team meeting to finalize the 504 plan.  Ms. Sped was very candid that my points were certainly valid,but unfortunately beyond her expertise.  She volunteered to make sure that both the School Psychologist and the District’s Director of SpEd are in attendance at our next meeting so that they can address the issue in detail.

originally posted Tyler’s 504 (long one)…. – CURLYGURL’s MySpace Blog | Cyndi–s Jewels

Bill of Rights for Children with ADHD

HELP ME TO FOCUS…

Please teach me through my sense of touch. I need “hands-on” and body movement.

I NEED TO KNOW WHAT COMES NEXT…

Please give me a structured environment where there is a dependable routine. Give me an advance warning if there will be changes.

WAIT FOR ME, I’M STILL THINKING…

Please allow me to go at my own pace. If I’m rushed, I get confused and upset.

I’M STUCK, I CAN’T DO IT…!

Please offer me options for problem solving. If the road is blocked, I need to know the detours.

IS IT RIGHT? I NEED TO KNOW NOW…

Please give me rich and immediate feedback on how I’m doing.

I DIDN’T KNOW I WASN’T IN MY SEAT…!

Please remind me to stop, think, and act.

AM I ALMOST DONE…?

Please give me short work periods with short-term goals.

WHAT…?

Please don’t say “I already told you that.” Tell me again, in different words. Give me a signal. Draw me a symbol.

I KNOW IT’S ALL WRONG, ISN’T IT…?

Please give me praise for partial success. Reward me for self-improvement, not just for perfection.

BUT WHY DO I ALWAYS GET YELLED AT…?

Please catch me doing something right and praise me for the specific positive behavior. Remind me–and yourself–about my good points when I’m having a bad day.

{Author Unknown}

	CURLYGURL	I bawled when I read this… just bawled.   Posted by CURLYGURL on October 27, 2005 – Thursday – 10:23 PM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

Ei

Uhm, I did too…and so far no one’s diagnosed my kid with ADHD.  Posted by Ei on November 2, 2005 – Wednesday – 7:54 AM [Reply to this]  [Remove]  [Block User]

via Bill of Rights for Children with ADD – CURLYGURL’s MySpace Blog | Cyndi–s Jewels.

Update: Tyler & Halle’s New School

Tyler and Halle started at their new school on Monday. Halle was placed in the Multi-Age Group (MAG); the group consists of children in 1st, 2nd & 3rd grade who work with four teachers for those three years. The kids are grouped by ability rather than by age or grade, so you can imagine I was very excited about this option. Her homeroom teacher is Mrs. P, and she had a reading evaluation her first day and was placed in the highest first grade reading group with Mrs. G. Her reading and math homework is picking up where she left off at the end of kinder, so the weeks she spent writing the letter O at the charter school didn’t cause her to fall behind. She seems to be settling in very nicely. There was a MAG Family Potluck at school tonight and she followed along with the songs the class performed pretty well for only having four days to learn them! She was assigned two study buddies (Tara and Mo) the first day of school to kinda show her around and keep her from getting lost (the building is kinda circular); Mo’s father stopped me to introduce himself and say that Mo’s been talking about Halle non-stop ever since Monday. I’m her mama so of course I think she’s special, but she is so shy sometimes that it always surprises me to hear her described as if she’s the Pied Piper.

I had been a little nervous about Tyler’s classroom placement; the Kyrene district offers gifted services to students who score in the 97th percentile on an achievement/IQ test; while Halle qualifies with a test score in the 98th percentile, Tyler’s highest score is ‘only’ about the 95th. I had talked with the school’s gifted coordinator about how strictly they adhere to that criteria. I said that if Tyler is challenged in the regular classroom, great, but if not, would the school take into consideration that Tyler has ADHD, a condition protected by the IDEA, and provide gifted services even if he didn’t technically qualify, as it could easily be argued that his ‘disability’ might have had a negative impact on his score. I was assured that their focus was on the best interests of the child. She and I agreed to see how things went the first few weeks and if he wasn’t challenged, he would be evaluated for the language arts and math gifted classes. I figured that was better than what we had at the charter school (nothing), but really expected I would have to push for it if he needed it. I spoke with Mr. C for a little while after classes started about how Tyler’s ADHD affects him both academically and socially and was really heartened by the conversation and the interest he had expressed in helping Tyler grow. I was sitting at my desk counting down the minutes till school released at 2:30 so I could call and see how the kids’ days went, and at 2:21 Mr. C calls to let me know how Tyler’s first day went.  Said Tyler had a pretty good day, they did the reading evaluation and since he had scored at an eighth grade reading level they placed him in the gifted reading group.  I almost fell out of my chair… a) I knew he read above grade level but didn’t think he read that far above grade level and b) I was fully expecting that I would have to push in order for him to get into either the gifted language arts or math classes.  Mr. C said that Tyler seemed to be at the higher end of the students in his class math wise, but hasn’t been introduced to a couple concepts (i.e., double digit multiplication).  He said he’d worked one on one with Tyler and got the impression that it would not take him long to catch on and be ready to move on with the class.  This was a little disappointing, not for the new school, but that the eight weeks Tyler spent reviewing addition at the charter school did cause him to fall behind.  But the positive note is that I am really confident that this teacher will get him caught up and that if Tyler shows indication he’s ready to move on, it’s not going to take a massive fight for me to get him into the gifted math class.  Mr. C goes on to talk about how Tyler works in a group; I had indicated he has had trouble working in groups because he is always sure he’s right and has a hard time accepting otherwise.  He noticed this while he and Tyler were working one on one, and that he was observing Tyler while he was working in a foursome during science.  He said Tyler definitely seemed to be a take charge kind of guy and that he’d needed to step in a couple times and remind Tyler to let the others participate.  He sounded a little hesitant, as if concerned I might take offense, and asked if I’d be interested in Tyler participating in a group that would begin meeting after break that focuses on working together and getting along.  Now that Tyler is no longer struggling academically, my next biggest concern are his social skills – his tendency to butt in or try to take over definitely impacts how his peers feel about him and he just doesn’t understand that what he considers being helpful, they consider bossy – I think I said yes before he got done asking the question!  That night I made sure to ask Tyler about what he’d done in science, and I have never seen him so animated about an experiment.  Since he struggles with following sequential directions, science isn’t exactly his favorite subject.  I could definitely see how his excitement would lead him to try and just take the whole project over.  I’m not sure how he’s doing socially in his class; however, several students stopped to say hello to him at the assembly tonight.  I’m just not sure if they are kids he knows from his grade/class, or other kids from this area who bus over from this neighborhood.

 I can never remember what I’ve told who; so if you’re wondering what led to the kids leaving our home district in the first place and/or them switching schools two months into the school year on top of that, here’s a brief recap of the sitch:

 

Tyler, having finished third grade at a K-3 school, would have transferred over to the gifted magnate at a 4-8th grade school. I had some concerns from the outset about the quality of their math program, and was pretty mortified by a conversation I had with the 4th grade gifted teacher.  Y’all know Tyler has plans to work for NASA, and those plans include getting into an Aerospace Magnate program that’s offered at our local high school in addition to taking honors math classes.  I had no confidence in the quality of instruction he’d be getting, and started investigating other options.  I had planned to leave Halle at MLK; I was so pleased with the 2nd/3rd grade gifted classes there and she had just qualified for the program.  But then the district implemented a universal literacy program that was (IMO) basically an intervention program targeting very low level students.  I just could not see Halle being challenged by it at all, and decided to leave the district all together.  I was considering a neighboring district with a good reputation that offered bus service to this area, or a new charter school a few miles from my work that had a campus in Tucson that was ranked as an excelling school by the AZ Dept of Ed.  There were some challenges at the time with the bus drop offs in the afternoon in addition to my concerns about gifted services, so I went with the charter school because they committed to me that their smaller class sizes would enable my children to accelerate without being held back.  That turned out to be the complete opposite of what actually happened during the eight weeks were there, and that’s putting it mildly.  Just when I had reached the breaking point with the charter school, I was able to make arrangements for after school care that would allow the kids to attend the school started Monday.

Am I totally against medication?

Not totally against it, but in general feel as a course of treatment, it should be used as a last resort, not a first line of defense. I have concerns about it yes, but I am at the point where I feel like I’ve exhausted all other resources. I’ve tried every parenting strategy and consequence I can think of… from spanking to not spanking, extra chores, loss of privileges, loss of possessions (took all his toys out of his room for about two weeks once), restriction to his room… I’ve changed his diet and eliminated all carbs in the AM and he is no longer to eat breakfast at school. We went to a few therapy sessions and that was a waste of time, though it’s probably because of the therapist. I’ve seen improvements to his behavior with two things I tried, but the first lasted two weeks, and the second lasted a little less than that. And it’s not that Tyler’s just not performing to his potential, or that he’s struggling a little bit… he is literally drowning. He is currently failing second grade. If I’m remembering correctly, he only has a passing grade (C or better) in two core subjects (B in math, C in science) and even those aren’t anywhere near his potential. He is reading above grade level, but his other language arts skills are a full year behind (penmanship, paragraph development). He is doing (albeit simple) multiplication and division using his head/fingers/letters in a book as counters, and that’s third grade work… his class is still learning regrouping. And with this NCLB crap, even if Tyler passes 2nd grade, Tyler will not pass third grade (he’ll be required to take the AIMS test) if he cannot demonstrate what we know he is capable of… there is a written essay portion in the test and I don’t know how he’ll pass it, although he can probably complete all other areas (even if not to his potential) through elimination.

nervous

Well, tomorrow is the big day… I am pretty nervous about it.  I really think I might have a nervous breakdown if I don’t get some answers out of this.  Ms. 2nd Grade has requested a conference to evaluate Tyler’s placement in her classroom.  It breaks my heart, but logically I understand.  If he’s in the room, he makes it impossible for the other kids to learn, and does nothing himself.  The only way she can teach is to send him out of the room… in which case, why have him in the class?

 

Joel has actually been calling quite often, and I’ve spoken with Sandy twice in the last week as well.  Joel mentioned the possibility of Tyler living with him for a year – not changing custody or child support, but just trying something different to see if it helps.  I told him that I’ve considered it, but I have three big concerns, and I’m just not ready to go there… but it doesn’t mean that I won’t consider it at all, if I can’t help Tyler.  He said he understood my feelings and my concerns were valid, but he just wanted to put the option out there, that he didn’t know if I was at the point where I was ready to throw up my hands because he knows I’m carrying the full load.  I told him that regardless of that, I want Tyler to spend more time with him, and that instead of me trying to send Tyler out there after his birthday, I’m considering that he needs to go as soon as he gets out of school and spending most of the break with Joel.  I also told him that I believe Tyler will eventually ask to live with his dad… he said he doubted that.  I told him that Tyler is very attached to him, despite the physical distance and spotty communication, and that I really think as Tyler enters puberty he’s going to feel a need to be with Joel… and that we’ll have to talk about it in depth, but that even if it doesn’t happen now, I believe it will happen at some point later.