Updates

My babies are getting too big! Tyler doesn’t want to use his little character silverware anymore! He want regular spoons & forks! And Halle has figure out how to get her fist in her mouth and when she’s lying on her back, she raises her feet and butt and raises her head and shoulders like she’s trying to sit up… it looks like those modified situps!

I spoke w/Roro last night and mentioned to him the number’s I’d come up with on that calculator. Originally we had planned for him to put his stuff in storage and stay with me and split expenses while I was on maternity leave, but that lasted about two weeks because he works graveyards & it was almost impossible for him to sleep with everyone else in the house, especially Tyler. So after he moved out we just decided he would continue paying me $275, because I felt that was all I *needed* (although things are a little tight and I could certainly use more). I’m still totally OK with that amount, but if that *girl* gets $1000/mo from him we’re gonna have a problem. It’s not fair to Halle or Hurriyah, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to struggle while Sandy makes a living off of him. I told him all this, then I told him about my friend who’s SD had kinda filed against himself so that the first woman who filed wouldn’t get the bulk and leave the other two kids with next to nothing. He says he’d rather do that and have the kids get even amounts, and that he wants to talk about it more when he gets back from Canada. I can see that we’re all going to wind up going to court now and that kinda pisses me off. The state of AZ doesn’t live in my house and I don’t want them involved in my business any more than they already are… in my experience w/Joel they’re a pain in the @ss and it takes them FOREVER to do anything. I didn’t want to go that route w/Roro, but it looks like I’ll have to. AAAARGH!!!!!!!

I spoke w/Joel last night – perfect example of DCSE’s pokiness… he mailed a bank draft for Nov child support 2 weeks ago and I still haven’t gotten it. We also talked for a long time about Tyler and his “issues”… the temper tantrums, the whining, the back-talking… this is the first long talk we’ve had since he left because I’ve been to angry to really talk to him when he calls – I just give the phone to Tyler. I’d told him that Tyler wasn’t adjusting well but I don’t think he realized how serious I was until last night. He’s working a contracting job through some hospital during the day and just got on with gateway in the evenings/night… he’s going to finish his contract out at the end of this month and then he’ll just continue working full time w/Gateway, but he says that he’s going to try to get out here to see Tyler in January. He suggested taking Tyler for a couple months, and I told him sorry, but I’m not gonna be away from my baby that long just because you decided to jett across the country. He said he understood and that he just wanted to help and maybe a couple weeks will be OK. I said that was fine… we were talking about all the changes in the last year being too much for Tyler, and he told me that he knows he’s not much help there and that he just wants to try and fix what his leaving has done to Tyler and that he knows that I’m on my own right now as far as Tyler is concerned. We were talking about how Tyler is used to having me 100% and he says that since day one I’ve always done more for Tyler than any other mother he knew could or would do… I started crying, which is what I do pretty much every time he gives me props. We go through stages of being really close and being kinda distant and once or twice a year we have a good fight, but I really miss him… when he left I lost a major support system and a really good friend. Even though he has the “Uncle Daddy” syndrome, if I call him up and say ‘you need to have a word w/your son’, he was always at my back. So I’m really hoping that he makes it out next month… Tyler will be in heaven.

Well, I have to go draft a letter for Roro requesting a continuance for this custody hearing for Hurriyah… they want him to appear in NJ a week after his lower back surgery… not gonna happen. He’ll be on bedrest for a good 6 weeks… which means 6 weeks that he can’t chase me around and I can figure out what I want to do about him.

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