nervous

Well, tomorrow is the big day… I am pretty nervous about it.  I really think I might have a nervous breakdown if I don’t get some answers out of this.  Ms. 2nd Grade has requested a conference to evaluate Tyler’s placement in her classroom.  It breaks my heart, but logically I understand.  If he’s in the room, he makes it impossible for the other kids to learn, and does nothing himself.  The only way she can teach is to send him out of the room… in which case, why have him in the class?

 

Joel has actually been calling quite often, and I’ve spoken with Sandy twice in the last week as well.  Joel mentioned the possibility of Tyler living with him for a year – not changing custody or child support, but just trying something different to see if it helps.  I told him that I’ve considered it, but I have three big concerns, and I’m just not ready to go there… but it doesn’t mean that I won’t consider it at all, if I can’t help Tyler.  He said he understood my feelings and my concerns were valid, but he just wanted to put the option out there, that he didn’t know if I was at the point where I was ready to throw up my hands because he knows I’m carrying the full load.  I told him that regardless of that, I want Tyler to spend more time with him, and that instead of me trying to send Tyler out there after his birthday, I’m considering that he needs to go as soon as he gets out of school and spending most of the break with Joel.  I also told him that I believe Tyler will eventually ask to live with his dad… he said he doubted that.  I told him that Tyler is very attached to him, despite the physical distance and spotty communication, and that I really think as Tyler enters puberty he’s going to feel a need to be with Joel… and that we’ll have to talk about it in depth, but that even if it doesn’t happen now, I believe it will happen at some point later.