Today’s grats will be short and sweet… I’m driving Daija up to visit Biker Dad today & have some last minute packing and hair to do so we can get this show on the road.
- Tyler goes back to school this week. That boy has eaten the better part of four loaves of bread and a jar of peanut butter this week.
- The girls have fall break this week. It will be nice not to worry about hair or be rushing a little girl who had time for lip gloss but forgot to brush her teeth until it was time to leave. *SMH*
- Speaking of Biker Dad, I am also very thankful for him and my Aunt Laura. It’s been a joy having them in my life this past year.
- I must also give thanks to my Aunt Joyce, who has also been a joy to me. She never stopped hoping we’d be reunited and never stopped looking for me. Had it not been for her hope and faith, we all would be missing so much.
Guest blogging a review of 1-2-3 Magic is one of my oldest friends, Heidi. We’ve been friends for more than 20 years. This girl loves her family and friends, is deeply passionate about her causes, and I don’t know anyone who loves school as much as she does. In addition to being a mom, wife, gardener, and raw foods officionado, Heidi volunteers as a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA).
Does that sound familiar?
How about: “You are grounded until you are 30!” Two days later, “Mom, can I go to so-and-so’s house” “Yeah, sure, have a good time.”
Or perhaps: “The reason you can’t do that, is……..**Twenty minutes later**….do you understand?”
We all have our parenting issues…whether learned from our parents, from well meaning parenting classes or even the University of Hard Knocks. Regardless of the differences, there is one thing that I hear from almost every parent: “I wish there was a manual that came with this kid.” The closest thing I have ever found is 1-2-3 Magic. Read more…
I mean, we already talk because the bottom line is if you don’t talk to them, Lil Wayne‘s going to talk to them. So, I mean, really.Somebody’s going to talk them – I love New York – somebody’s going to talk to them. So the point is, who’s going to talk and what’s going to be said? And I like what he did because what was said needed to be said. It was from personal experience. I’m anxious for part two, okay? There’s nothing like being able to share with your daughter what you went through, you understand? Because she’s looking – my daughter’s looking at me. You know, she may like Michelle Obama, she may like her grandmother, but she’s looking at me.
Let that last sentence marinate… I mean, really, really marinate. When our daughters are looking at us, what are we showing them? Regardless of what we tell them, what do they see? Read more…
I know you’re being pulled in a lot of different directions. I know that you don’t want to disappoint me, but you don’t want to look like a baby to your friends. I know that sometimes it’s easier to go with the crowd than create a conflict. I know that sometimes it’s easier to let someone else take the lead rather than make a tough decision. Sometimes it might seem like if you let someone else set the pace, then they’re responsible for whatever happens.
I know sometimes it seems that way, but it’s not. People are generally going to treat you the way you allow them to treat you. So YOU have to decide how that’s going to be. YOU have to decide what your expectations are for yourself, and YOU have to communicate those expectations. If you don’t, you’re going to find yourself being treated in ways that you may not like, and in situations you don’t want to be in.
Your friend found herself in a compromising situation today. She had the power to have completely changed that dynamic. It’s not going to be that long before you girls are dating, and it really bothers me to see a trend developing where 11yo girls are letting 11yo boys make decisions about how their bodies are going to be touched. I hope you never give your power to a boy that way.
You looked surprised when I said you have power. You’re becoming a woman, and that’s the most incredible power. Someday your body will be able to create and sustain a life. Someday THIS BODY will make a miracle. Your body is the source of your power. It’s yours and yours alone to decide who you will share it with. Intimacy is a gift, one to be shared with someone that you care about, not something to be taken lightly by someone who just wants to see how far he can go or what he can get away with.
So not quite a year ago, I got a lot of answers to a lot of questions I’d had when I met my (biological) father, who I have since affectionately dubbed “Biker Dad.” One of those questions had been… what am I? I know that on my mother’s side, my nana was second generation English, and my mother’s father was half Native American (I don’t recall the tribe, and the source of this particular tidbit of information is questionable in any case)… my grandpa (my mom’s stepfather) was second generation Italian. So last winter I learned that my (biological) paternal grandmother was second generation Russian, and Jewish.
I’m not sure what this means to me, exactly. I’ve felt drawn to some aspects of Judaism that I can’t really explain, even though I knew it was not my faith. I usually update my facebook status with greetings to my Jewish and Muslim friends on their holy days, but this year Rosh Hashanah greetings feel a little more personal. While it won’t be a religious observance for me, it will certainly be a time of reflection.
On that note, I was tickled by this video shared by a friend…
I’ve had some personally surreal moments over the last few months. Normally, this is the kind of post I would restrict to my preferred list… you know, the people who know me intimately and to whom I can share the deep dark or completely nutty things and know that even if they judge me for it, they’ll still love me anyway. But this one, even though it falls into both categories, I think I’ll just leave out there. It’s going to contain a lot of mess and may not make a damn bit of sense to anyone who doesn’t know me ‘like that’ but on the other hand, maybe someone will see something in it that they need.
In March, Tyler had an appointment with a leading developmental pediatrician in the field of ADHD, at a Child Study Center. We were to review some screenings for depression and anxiety. Tyler was showing some significant signs of both. As the PNP was asking questions to Tyler at the end of the appointment to get an idea of how often he was feeling depressed/sad and anxious/worried, she asked him if he ever thought about suicide. Tyler had, and of greater concern, when she asked him how he’d do it, Tyler had a suicide plan. Read more…